When Whitney Wolfe Herd hit the button on the IPO of her dating app Bumble to the NASDAQ, she became an instant inspiration to millions, myself included. Standing before the press, with her son hugged tightly to her hip, I felt genuine excitement at what she had achieved for herself and her family.

Her story of drive and ambition, at times in the face of serious resistance, is inspiring me to shake off my fear of failure. It’s a feeling that held me back in my early career and one I have had to work on more urgently after stepping off the corporate ladder to launch a start-up.

Fear and authenticity

Identifying the cause of the fear of failure can be difficult to pinpoint. I know for many people, there is often no pivotal event that creates the feeling of being an imposter. My personal reflection is that it’s something that builds over time, and perhaps only something I have been able to articulate more easily the further into my start-up journey I go.

I believe moving up through the ranks of multi-national organisations had much to do with it. The corporate world attracts wonderfully talented people, but it frequently rewards those who shout loudest about their achievements.

In that world, the expectation to be loud, boastful and sometimes even aggressive to get a point across and justify a leadership position didn’t rest well with me. I wasn’t any of those things and convinced myself that if I didn’t adopt those behaviours, I wouldn’t succeed and I wasn’t good at my job.

As I’ve come to face up to and speak about my fears more openly, so I have realised this is a common scenario. Gender and race equality campaigns have also highlighted that there are many people – not just women – who can’t be, or struggle to be authentic at work.

In my case, fear of failure was wrapped up in being true to myself. If you can’t take your whole self to work then you can’t achieve.

Read the signs

However, now I have the freedom to use my skills and expertise to help other businesses achieve their goals, it has helped me to do two things: firstly, pin-point the triggers that would allow me to be overwhelmed by the ‘corporate version’ of me, and secondly deal with them.

For many, the fear of failure or imposter symptom can manifest as a crushing sense of self-doubt, and lead to over analysing everything you do and say or decision you make. As a business owner making countless decisions every day that can have a real impact on your future, it’s not a state you want to dwell in.

But you can get a handle on it. For instance, I have learnt how to read the signs and deal with them. I know a feeling of self-doubt can appear when I have intensively delivered several pieces of client work or I’m awaiting agreement on a large number of proposals.

If I’m juggling too many things, it’s a warning sign to take a step back and regain some perspective. Sometimes you need to slow down in order to speed up and with revenue growth of over 250% last year, it shows I’ve got the balance right.

Three tips for managing the fear

Distilling what I have learnt on my business journey, there are three other things to focus on if you find the fear of failure is eating you up.

1. Self-awareness. I can’t say this will go for everyone who experiences a fear of failure, but people have commented on my high levels of self-awareness. I am aware of my strengths but I’m also very aware of my areas of weakness.

   We all have them, but I think the way to manage your emotions related to fear is being able to clearly recognise that a weakness is just a skill you don’t have, or a way of thinking that you find difficult. When you acknowledge that you won’t and can’t be an expert at everything fear diminishes.

In practical terms, it means when you need help you should ask for it, either by working with an expert, or employing one. In my case, that has been a real point of change in terms of how I approach growing and leading the business successfully. I am no longer an employee, so it’s fine to change how I approach things.

2. Feel the fear. I’ve learnt to approach life differently and as such tackle daunting situations differently. I tell myself to ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’. The reality is not everything you do will go perfectly but 9 times out of 10 it will go well enough. So, it’s better to try than not to. The important thing is to keep learning and ask what needs to change next time. Can you present your work in a different way, adjust the sales process or introduce a new proposition to deliver even greater value?
3. Eliminate doubt. When you are over-analysing, you can inject doubt into your engagement with other people. Phases like ‘I think’ or ‘Perhaps’ play to your fears and can be self-fulfilling in casting that doubt into the mind of your audience. Work on eliminating phrases like this and replacing with affirmative words that demonstrate your expertise.

   It’s easier to do in written communication, so take a few seconds to re-read your email or proposal before you hit that send button. Clear direction is more likely to elicit a faster response and reduce the time in which uncertainly can start to creep in.

Leaving a corporate leadership position to set up your own business can definitely trigger the imposter feelings but I know it’s possible to tame them.

Finding ways to adjust your response to stay in control and focussed is essential. In doing so, you can stay steadfast to working on the things that ensure you are making the best possible use of your time and delivering the absolute best for your clients day in day out.

The best way to do this is to place a value on it – a kind of measure for worry over action - and in turn it will drive the business forward. Overall, I think it makes for more empathetic and honest leadership, but more than anything an authenticity you can’t deny.

Orla Murphy is co-founder of Seeblue Marketing.